Family Jokes

JOHN: I have the perfect son. KELVIN: Does he smoke? JOHN: No, he doesn't. KELVIN: Does he drink? JOHN: No, he doesn't. KELVIN: Does he ever come home late? JOHN: No, he doesn't....

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in, Mother, where do babies come from? The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, Well dear,...

Akpos' father wanted him and his brother, Mike to get an A in their mathematics exam. So he employed a mathematics tutor to help them pass their exams.They did the exams and few...

Mike was looking through the family album and asked his mother, "Who's this guy on the beach with you with all the muscles and curly hair?""That's your father." says his mother."...

I'm tired of all these Dettol advertisements. My younger brother who is just 5 years old carries Dettol in his pocket anywhere he goes. He pours Dettol in the toilet before using...

[Rings] SON: Hello Mummy?MUM: I'm Coming to your school today.SON: Aah! Nooo! They are fighting in front of my school!MUM: I've passed your gate.SON: You've passed the school's...

AKPOS: I've got a stomach ache.MUM: That's because you haven't eaten and your stomach is empty, so it hurts.AKPOS: Now I know why daddy has headaches all the time. His head must...

A young fellow brought home his bride-to-be to be appraised by his father.The father was shocked, angry and embarrassed. He took the boy aside into the next room and whispered in...

A group of fathers are sitting around talking about their teenage daughters. One dad says, "I think my 16 year old is smoking; I found an empty cigarette pack under her bed." All...

"Daddy," said a six-year-old boy, "I'd like to get married.""Sure, son." said his father. "Anyone special in mind?""Yes," answered the boy. "Grandma. Shes nice.""Now, wait a...

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